Mommy Look, It's sucking on my nipple!

First there were baby dolls, then there were baby dolls with bottles, and now we've finally taken that extra step, baby dolls that breastfeed.

Spain has recently released Bebe Gloton, a baby doll that comes complete with a Bra halter for girls to wear with flower petal nipples so that their fake baby can pretend to suck milk out of their fake prepubescent teats.

To me this is FUCKED UP!!

I mean many people are defending the doll saying how it's completely natural to breastfeed and that girls should understand that, and i understand that point of view and also agree with breastfeeding completely.....but this is not the time for young girls to get that lesson...

Girls don't even fully understand what their boobies are for at this age, i mean we don't even teach sex ed until after they've been flastchestly feeding these babies for a good 5 years. In my opinion these dolls were created by pedophiles in disguise as titty lovers. If a doll can suck on your nipple, why not a creepy grown ass man? I just feel like this shit will confuse girls when they're this young.

Maybe i've just been watching too much Law and Order:SVU recently....


Next thing you know more pedophiles in disguise will come out of the woodwork offering "pretend" breast exams to little girls saying how it's promoting women's health and teaching girls a good lesson.

A Tribute to "Holding Moments"

Things Veronica's drunken boyfriend said:

When asked if he was asleep:
"You'll never fall asleep again, I promise."

Out of nowhere:
"Look at the halfscreen, everyone is wearing robes!"
"Everyone has that type of phone. People just walk in with their homes."
"Are you sleeping through the evolution tomorrow baby?"

He sits up out of nowhere so we naturally ask what he's doing:
"I'm waiting for it to fucking scroll down for me. It eliminates all other competition."

In response to seeing me text:
"What are you telling your country bumpkin?!?!"

What do you want to do?:
"Yeah sounds fine." (what sounds fine?) "whatever you said." (what did i say?) "something about cupcakes."

Promise me you won't die:
"Don't worry not in the car." (Stevie we're not in the car.) "Oh did you get the gate open?" (Stevie, we've been in your apartment for the past two hours.) (opens eyes) "How did you get in here?!?!?!"

Diagnosis:

Wernicke's aphasia, Dementia, Alcoholism

The Secret Life of Public Restrooms

Up until college, the only public buildings i've ever really been in were high school, and like a walgreens or Jewel, or restaurant. It was always very easy to find the bathroom, you just ask the waitress and she directs you to the women's bathroom and the men's is always right next door.

BUT ALL OTHER BUILDINGS ARE DIFFERENT!
In these whack ass lecture halls, the bathrooms are almost never right next to each other! they're sometimes even on different floors!

what was i saying? this True Life is getting real as hell...

Right, whack ass buildings, so since these architects, for some bizarro reason, decided that having men's and women's bathrooms far as hell from each other was more aesthetically pleasing, i really think they put in some extra effort and did some really sophisticated research to help decide where to place these seperate restrooms. Everytime i ever need to go to the bathroom, BOOM, Women's, it's right there. Most buildings i can't even find the men's bathroom if i try, like in the dining hall where i work, when i get bored i look around for it...no where to be found. mother fucking invisible, like the room of requirement. People think that Harry Potter shit is magical, but invisible rooms that can only be found by people who need them already exist in the form of publc restrooms. The only building that fucked up is the Transportation building, they screwed up, the women's is impossible to find. It's pretty rough when you're in lecture crazy hungover and have to throw up and are forced to use the men's.....very shameful.

I just don't understand why they put all this money and research to engineer this advanced technology but then never keep the bathrooms clean.

Heart=Broken

MIKE CLARK IS A LITTLE ASSHOLE.

I CHALLENGE YOU TO THESE GAMES THREE:

-BOGGLE
-CLUE
-40 HATS FOR 40 CATS

Minesweeper

I am the fucking best at sweeping mines.

I am going to drop out of college and just sweep mines for a living.

Beginner: 13 Seconds
Intermediate: 72 seconds
Advanced: 240 seconds

Try to beat that just try!
if you do beat it congratulations you're just an asshole who wants to break a young girl's heart.

Happy Take a Chance Day everyone!

Love,
Veronica

p.s. i reeally want some brownies

I love you Scooby

I skipped class today to watch Scooby-Doo. It was a good decision.

Scooby Doo has always been my absolute favorite cartoon, my first crush ever was on shaggy which i think is a pretty accurate depiction of how i would feel about guys later in life. Instead of the fashionable, attractive, and intelligent Fred, i liked the goofy dirty fool who eats dog food. Scooby Snacks must be packed full of amphetamines and cocaine; have you seen the way they get crazy perky and cracked out from "dog food"?? I really wish life could just be as nice as it is on Scooby Doo. I would love to be a member of the gang traveling across the country solving easy ass mysteries while never having to work and staying at hotels for free as long as you can help get rid of the swamp creature that's scaring away customers. Velma and Fred usually do all the work anyway, shaggy just eats and hangs out with his dog and Daphne...I actually have no clue what the fuck she does.

There are never any issues or problems with their lives either. There's no episode where Velma's uncle is in a terrible accident or where Fred gets Daphne preggers. I think i'm gonna try to convince some people to drop out of school with me, get a dog and just drive around in a van solving mysteries, taking amphetamines, and ridding the world of banshees and ghosts. Plus we'd get to have groovy background music playing all the time.

I am Going to an Anime Convention

I really
Am disappointed with
Myself here. I swear I'm not a
Greasy haired nerd
Obsessing over half dressed prepubescent
Ivory skinned girls. That's really
Not me at all. So I'd like to explain myself. I'm only
Going because my good friend
Tom insists that it will be better than Christmas and my birthday and an
Orgasm combined. And that
All day you just walk around getting drunk and making fun of
Nerdy boys dressed up as
Anime characters.
Now, this combines two of my favorite things to do, spend an entire weekend
Intoxicated and be the bitch that i am and
Make fun of people. Also the
Event would be free, so it's not like i'm spending
Cash money to go to some anime freak show. The
Opportunities to laugh seem
Never ending by the way tom describes it. There is this
Virtual dating game that some guys play there where they talk to a computer like it's a girl. There is
Even a seminar on how to talk to women! So don't worry friends, I haven't turned into a
Nerd. I just want
To get drunk all day, stay
In a hotel, and make fun
Of greasy haired and perverted
Nerds.

I don't even watch anime.

fuck

i hate all boys minus my friend jimmy john and the host of the soup

fuck anime

I watched this shit high last night.

No one in the world is as happy as these two mother fuckers. It's really depressing. All they do is laugh, even when they're just doing chores like pumping water.

This has been a really really terrible day.
I don't ever want to get out of bed again.
I wish i were smarter.
I wish I had a home that i could go to without having to pay rent.
this is the emoest post ever.
I like simple sentences.
fuck.